Truth be told I only ever came in last once (though I was close many times) and, this is not that story. This is a story of a time I lost a cross country race to my slightly younger sister. For a brief period of time we were both in Cross Country at the same time. I loved it, she hated it (well I think she hated it I’m not entirely sure but since she didn’t sign up again the following year I’m assuming she hated it). I worked really hard and she was faster then me. Whatever, no big deal.
|photo courtesy of photosbygoad.com|
Except, this one race when for some reason we were actually running really closely to each other. There was a very well-meaning woman cheering from the sidelines and she was saying to me “GO GO! DON’T LET YOUR YOUNGER SISTER BEAT YOU!!!” Then to my sister she was saying “GO ON YOU CAN DO IT! CATCH YOU SISTER!” Really?! Lady we can both hear what your saying! It irritated me. Not because I didn’t want my sister to beat me, it irritated me that she thought that turning us against each other would actually work in making us better. Honestly, I think it slowed me down. Courtney caught me and, if memory serves, I think I puffed out “good job…keep…up…kick…it…in…” then nearly died.
I’m proud that I said those things but what I wish I had done was to drop back grab her hand and say “Come on let’s finish this race together!” That actually sums up my only regret from High School. Not in that moment but in all the moments I could have said to her “Come on to this movie with me and my friends.” or “Come on let’s hang out.” I wish I had said to her back in those days that “we should do life together”. Instead, I was very territorial. I didn’t want to share my friends, or clothes, or anything. My insecurities got the best of me and clouded my vision as to who God had placed right in my very home. Not saying we hated each other, we didn’t. But, she would have benefited from being allowed a bigger place in my life and social circle. I would have benefited too.
We’ve moved on and are extremely close. I’ve apologized to her and our only regret now is that we’re separated by so much distance. What an ironic twist of fate that I wish we could be together and we can’t. It saddens me that so many grown women are still experiencing walls built between them and they’re siblings. It saddens me to see sisters torn apart. It crushes my heart that women allow their insecurities and society to create such an atmosphere of competition between them and other women that they completely miss out on doing life together.
We allow our minds to be overtaken with thoughts on “who’s thinner”, “who’s more successful”, “who nursed their children”, “who gave birth with no drugs…” God created women to need the companionship and love of other women. Not just of our own mother’s and sisters but those of our sisters in christ too. Let’s not allow satan to scream at us from the sidelines. His intentions are not to improve our race. We can’t allow him to trick us into trying to prove we’re better then each other. Instead let’s embrace each other. Let’s grab hands in front of his shocked eyes and run to the finish line as one.