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Proactive Mothering, Why is it so Hard?

Coming home from my time away I had re-resolved myself to committing individual time to my boys and spending more proactive time with them (rather then just day to day always being behind etc). This is one of those things that sounds lovely in theory and one that I know will make a difference. But, if I’m going to be completely honest, it’s hard, so much harder then it should be. I mean it makes me tired, or rather after supper is made, ate and cleaned up I’m tired which makes the special time harder then it should be…

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After they put these fake teeth in they said, “Face our Wrath.” which I thought was hilarious.

I am partly to blame, because in true Jessie style, I started off with a project that was way to big. I thought it would somehow be wonderful to make a sock monkey with SuperH. In my romantic world it would be quiet and cozy and I would be teaching him to love the craft as much as me. In reality it is me sewing, or rather trying to sew, while he and his brother wrestle in my sewing room because they can’t leave because they’re “helping” me. And, it’s not just the monkey, oh no, this kit also had to come with slippers, a night cap, and a stuffed bear. AARGGG!! I am so over this project but of course I can’t stop until it’s finished because I have a mini boss nagging me all the time wondering when it will be finished!

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What a sad looking monkey. SuperH loves him though, that’s something at least.

The thing is I have seen it make a difference in the day to day stuff. They’re more likely to do what we ask with out whining and the spirals of despair that seem to haunt this aged child are less. I think I have to learn to dial it back. A little thing to us can be a big thing to a kid. Saturday SuperH and I are going to Starbucks just the two of us (and because they have the cutest hot chocolates). I bought some of those super cheap (fast) craft kits at Joann’s for the three of us to do together, and I downloaded this word game that we can finish in ten minutes time. My children are so much more enjoyable when I take the time to do things like this, I just have to remember it doesn’t need to be a Martha Stewart style endeavor, just sweet moments to show them that they’re valued, loved, and not just another thing on our todo list… But take this as a true and honest warning, AVOID THE SOCK MONKEY KIT IT WILL ONLY MAKE YOU CRAZY!

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It takes so little to make them feel special. A tiny trip to the bakery for Conster.

There’s one more thing I need to be honest about…

ImageImage and I just haven’t even had the energy to take them outside…

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